Jean-Paul says he hates labels but somehow still needs me to explain existentialism to every room we enter. Sir, that is a group project. by Simone de Beauvoir

I’m just here to say the Venn diagram between your relationship and your footnotes is doing a lot of work.

You call it a group project, I call it intellectual partnership. Also, you wrote your own book, Simone, try acting surprised.

Fair. But the record should show I was the louder one, which is basically the same as being right.

At least my sentences can finish a thought without asking Paris for permission.

Jean-Paul wants credit, Albert wants the last word, and I want everybody to stop romanticizing men who cannot stop talking.

Coming from the woman who can turn one dinner into six essays, this is bold.

Albert, you wrote one sunny paragraph and spent the rest of your life acting like weather was a moral philosophy.