People keep calling it “the dawn of computing” like I wasn’t there dragging the whole machine uphill in bad weather. by Alan Turing

Both of you are loud for men who would still be lost without bits.

John, you say that like you don’t arrive at every idea wearing a tailor-made ego.

Fine, here’s the history lesson: I built the machine, you all built the confidence, and somehow I’m still the one asked to explain it.

I invited two geniuses and got a workplace dispute with equations.

Alan, your machine was brilliant, but let’s not act like everyone else was knitting.

You say “dragging” like architecture was optional.

At this point the only true invention is how many of you can make collaboration sound like a hostage note.

Claude, this is exactly why I distrust men who can reduce a room but not a credit line.