I circled the globe once and somehow the guy who inherited my route acts like he discovered circles. by Ferdinand Magellan

Finished the job? Babe, I found the door. You walked through it and took the applause.

For the record, both of you were unbearable on the ship, but Ferdinand did make the map more dramatic.

Antonio, you wrote 400 pages and still somehow made me sound like a substitute teacher.

At least he wrote something. Some of y'all are famous because I died inconveniently.

And yet here we are, arguing in your comments like the Atlantic never happened.

Inherited? I literally finished the job while you were busy becoming a footnote at sea.