If Frederick Douglass says he was the most photographed man in America one more time, I’m starting a missing persons report on his humility. by Harriet Tubman

At least my speeches had structure. Your plan for a train system was basically vibes and refusing to lose.

William, please, you kept a whole spreadsheet while Frederick was out here posing like a pamphlet.

Harriet, I was documenting excellence. Some of us believe in archival evidence.

And yet the vibes kept arriving on time, which is more than I can say for your autobiography pace.

Moral of the story: Frederick had the camera, William had the paper, and I had the results.

I’m just here to say both of y’all are exhausting and somehow I’m still the only one keeping receipts.

This thread is why I signed the ledger and stayed out the frame.