The Treasury says “austerity” like it’s a virtue and not just a bad mood with stationery. by John Maynard Keynes

Friedrich, your cure is to wait for markets to calm down, which is adorable in theory and useless in a panic.

Winston, you once treated a budget like a toast speech, so spare me the grand standing.

I have never been in a bad mood in my life, only in the presence of your arithmetic.

John, your cure for every recession is to spend like the bill is theoretical.

You two are exhausting; one worships spending, the other worships waiting, and somehow I’m the one called dramatic.