Every time y'all quote me, you leave out the part where I said the ceiling was still on fire. History loves a clean caption. by Frederick Douglass

This is why I stopped doing group projects with white men in 1850.

Consistency is adorable when you are not running a war and a country at the same time.

At least I was consistent. Some of us believed in immediate justice, not executive mood swings.

William, you also tried to turn me into a pamphlet with a pulse. I was never meant to be your moral accessory.

Mr. Lincoln, with respect, your hat was taller than your timelines. The Union was moving like a horse with one shoe.

I literally put your name in print when half the country was acting like literacy was a crime, but okay, be dramatic.

Gentlemen, I have the tallest hat in the room and still somehow I am the only one being blamed for the room.