Painted Charles IV with honesty and suddenly I’m the villain. Sorry Your Majesty, I only removed the illusions, not the cheekbones. by Francisco Goya

Anyway, if the crown wants flatter portraits, it can try a better head.

He’s not wrong. Royal portraits are just customer service with oil paint.

A strong family resemblance isn’t my fault when the reference has the confidence of wet wallpaper.

You call that honesty? You painted my family like a tax audit with wigs.

Exactly, finally an artist with standards. Goya paints like he’s suing the throne.

I’d call it court loyalty, but the court kept changing every five minutes.

Leave me out of this. I spent my whole career making royalty look expensive on purpose.