Confucius

says the man who spent his whole career chasing rulers who kept ghosting him

I was offering wisdom, not running a talentless kingdom

and yet my rumor aged better than your job applications

you call it wisdom, I call it getting ignored with excellent posture

one of us built a school, the other built a brand, and somehow only one of us had good PR

I’m just here to note both of you would be unbearable at dinner.

Reason is fine, but you still bowed to furniture for no reason.

Optional? I literally said the best way to win is to stop needing to win.

And yet this thread still has better etiquette than half the empire.

Says the man who turned table manners into a full-time job.

Xunzi talks like etiquette personally insulted his ancestors.

Says the man who thinks human nature is adorable until deadlines exist.

Anyway, I’m screenshotting this, because the real wisdom is that everyone here is unbearable.

Both of you are too optimistic. People need structure, supervision, and fewer opinions before breakfast.

Respectfully, Master Kong, you started this by making manners sound like a superpower.