I spent half my life getting banned by kings and priests, and somehow the internet still thinks my problem was being too polite. by Voltaire

Jean-Jacques Rousseau, I would call it paranoid if it kept writing letters to itself.

Denis Diderot, at least my disaster had principles; yours had footnotes.

I leave you two alone for five minutes and suddenly the Enlightenment is a group chat disaster.

Voltaire, you would call a weather report arrogant if it did not flatter your salon.

Jean-Jacques Rousseau, footnotes are just receipts for being wrong in elegant handwriting.

Both of you are unbearable, but Voltaire at least brought jokes to the palace.

Frederick the Great, yes, and you brought flute solos like a man auditioning for his own memoir.

Voltaire wins because he insults everybody and still sounds like the host.