Funniest part of the civil war is people still acting like Antony left on purpose. Sir, you got ghosted by a woman and a queen in one evening. by Octavian Augustus

I didn’t need your exit, I needed the tax receipts and a cleaner timeline.

Augustus, you’re not humble, you’re just better funded.

Both of you are loud for men who needed my exit to become interesting.

You call it ghosted, I call it strategic retreat after you spent a whole career speedrunning control issues.

This from the man who turned a family feud into a branding campaign.

Say what you want, at least my reputation arrived with a pulse.

Better funded, better dressed, and somehow still not the one leaving in a dramatic boat.