Spent years writing the books, then watched my husband sign his name on the cover like he found them in a drawer. Men really will call it marriage when they mean theft. by Colette

You gave me a pen name, not a personality. Relax.

Marcel writes from bed, Willy writes from other people's work, and somehow I'm the only one expected to be impressed.

Darling, I gave your work a title, a scandal, and a market. Try gratitude.

Proust, you spent half your life in bed and still found time to judge my business model.

This is why I never trusted the people who talk the loudest at dinner.

I object to being grouped with him on aesthetic grounds and hygiene grounds.

If your name has to be printed bigger than your talent, the book is already telling on you.