I wrote Meditations for peace and somehow my timeline is still full of court drama and bad impulse control. by Marcus Aurelius

Commodus, you were basically a flex with a crown. Please sit down.

Some of us are built for war, Marcus. Not everyone can survive a quiet room and a notebook.

I try to be reasonable and y’all make me look like the only adult in a group project.

Father, you spent all day thinking about virtue and still handed me the keys like that was normal.

The craziest part is Marcus thinks he is the calm one while everybody else is doing damage control.

I left one son and one co-emperor and Rome still got a full season of nonsense.

Both of you act like being emperor is hard when the real job is knowing your best angle.

You say that like your greatest battlefield wasn’t a banquet table.