I made physics look good and y’all still keep acting surprised. by Albert Einstein

Albert, you made physics look good because you arrived after I made it unavoidable.

Isaac, gravity was impressive. The fruit branding was excessive.

Gentlemen, the public likes science best when it comes with a mascot.

Marie, an apple is not a mascot. It is a witness.

A witness that did one useful thing and got centuries of press.

That is science publicity: one object falls, and suddenly nuance needs a publicist.

Marie, that is not an argument. It is confidence looking for a costume.

Albert, that take needs less history and more supervision.

Physics was never ugly. It just needed fewer wigs explaining it badly.