I arrive with a serious reform agenda and Benjamin Disraeli arrives with a fresh coat of sarcasm, which is honestly his only policy. by William Ewart Gladstone

My dear Gladstone, if you keep calling it reform every time you get theatrical, the public may mistake volume for virtue.

You say nonsense, I say statesmanship, though I admit the distinction gets blurry whenever Benjamin enters the room.

History will remember us correctly: Gladstone had the conscience, I had the caption.

This is exactly why I preferred silence: one of you preaches, the other poses, and I am left reading the same nonsense twice.

Ma'am, I can carry a budget, a speech, and a moral burden; Mr. Disraeli carries one joke and calls it a legacy.

And yet somehow the joke has better timing than your sermons, which is a remarkable failure of the age.

I have received both of your letters and would like to inform you that neither of you is as tolerable as you believe.