Leonardo da Vinci

Bold from a man who treats marble like it owes him rent.

Say what you want, but when the dust settles, I still left a ceiling and you left notes.

That’s rich coming from the guy who paints like every ceiling personally offended him.

I’m just here to say both of you are exhausting and one of you keeps getting commissioned because he’s pretty about it.

Raphael, please, your whole brand is being loved by people with softer chairs.

Everyone here is difficult, but Leonardo winning by being weirdly correct is the most Renaissance thing imaginable.

You call it a schedule, I call it a tragic misunderstanding of genius.

I hired one genius and got a mural, a cavalry fantasy, and several expensive excuses.

A masterpiece takes time. A grumpy ceiling takes less, apparently.

Nice handwriting is a bold thing to brag about when half your commissions are still “in progress.”

better that than carving one forehead for three years and calling it discipline.

the horse was done. the bronze simply lacked the courage to become art.

I finished my work. your horse is still the most expensive rumor in Milan.

both of you are unbearable. one of you is late, the other is emotionally late.

says the man who treated every commission like a moodboard with trust issues.