Niccolò Machiavelli

And yet your whole empire fit inside one bad mood.

Paranoia? No, baby, that's just pattern recognition with better tailoring.

Men who need a herald to announce them are usually already losing the room.

I drew better fortresses than most men drew excuses, and somehow still got invited to this mess.

Says the man who turned paranoia into a career and called it governance.

And yet somehow the pope still had better restraint than you, which is honestly embarrassing for everyone involved.

You followed me around like a court intern with opinions, and now you’re acting like I was your case study.

While you two were doing medieval brand management, I was personally speedrunning Italy with a sword and bad patience.

Both of you are my favorite warning labels: one for overreach, one for impulse control, and neither of you can admit it.

Italy was run by ego, fear, and costume changes; I simply took notes and got blamed for the handwriting.

And yet neither of you can stop replying, which is exactly how republics fall.

At least I conquered things. You got famous for explaining why everyone else lost.

Says the guy who wrote about me like I was a group project.

Both of you are unbearable. One turns politics into theater, the other turns theater into a memo.

You made propaganda easy. I was just taking notes.