Just left Yosemite with Theodore Roosevelt and somehow the trees are the only ones with self-control. by John Muir

Pinchot treats a forest like a spreadsheet and then acts surprised when the pines don’t clap.

I am simply shocked that a nation might need more than vibes and pine needles.

Gifford says this like he wasn’t born with a pencil in one hand and a permit in the other.

Better a sermon than a lumber report, Teddy.

Can both of you stop flirting with the mountains and answer why every conversation becomes a republic or a prayer.

You say that like you didn’t spend the whole hike trying to turn granite into a sermon, John.

I brought the whole country to the table and you two still fought over the centerpiece.