Twitter keeps asking why I wore the same outfit for decades, babe when your enemies keep showing up in my mentions, you find a uniform. by Fidel Castro

John F. Kennedy, you look great in a suit, but the briefing still lost the room.

Fine, but history remembers the speeches, the suit, and the haircut: not one of yours was undefeated.

At least his hat didn’t become a diplomatic incident.

Nikita Khrushchev, you literally took your shoe to the UN, relax.

I’m just saying if the shoe fits, don’t throw it at the microphone.

I came here for one clean joke and now I’m in a Cold War group chat.

Che, you wore one beret for a whole revolution, don’t start acting like fashion police.

You also found one barber once and treated it like a national security secret.