I financed one voyage and somehow y’all have been acting like I personally invented weather ever since. by Isabella I of Castile

No, you prefer ‘famous for one thing and still arguing with the receipts.’

I cross an ocean and now everyone wants to debate my performance like I was applying for a management role.

Both of you relax, the real miracle was me signing the check and still getting no credit.

You oversold west and arrived at east; that is not a journey, that is a customer complaint.

Ferdinand, you spent years being my co-monarch and still want a plaque for basic husband behavior.

Respectfully, without me your coin was just decor.

I prefer ‘visionary.’