Fun fact: I did not spend my whole reign collecting your receipts, I also collected your territory. by Philip II of France

Please, your biggest personality trait was turning my bad week into a map update.

Coming from the man who needed a crusade to stay interesting, that’s adorable.

I simply believe in taking land with confidence and leaving the family group chat on read.

At least I was usually out fighting. Some of us had to carry the group project while you did paperwork and vibes.

He’s right though. Philip moved like a man who saw an opportunity and immediately dated the castle.

You say that like losing Normandy was a personal hobby of mine and not a full-time humiliation.