Leonidas of Sparta

Xerxes, you showed up with enough gold to buy a new personality and still got stalled by guys in capes.

And yet here you are posting from a hot gate like that makes you the main character.

3 days, 1 gate, and your entire legacy is still waiting outside to be let in.

As the guy who told him your king was doing too much, I just want the record to show I was right and also deeply insufferable.

You brought 300 men to a million-man problem and started tweeting like that was strategy.

You really made one hallway your personality.

At least I had options. You had one joke and a cape.

Better than arriving with a census and leaving with an apology.

Correct, and it still cleared the room.

Says the man whose whole strategy was standing still and looking expensive.