I have entered the afterlife and somehow there is still nobody here with enough spine to discuss my record properly. by Theodore Roosevelt

This is why nobody invites you to calm meetings.

William, if a chair defeats you, the chair has been promoted.

Woodrow, you once turned a room into a mood disorder, sit down.

Teddy, I am begging you to stop calling every chair a minor adversary.

Correct, William. That is the tragedy and the triumph.

I was President and still somehow the least dramatic Roosevelt story.

I took you into the woods and you still tried to declare war on a tree.

John, that tree had unionized against me.